MichMoms Blog

Category: Child care

Mommy chooses 'The Village' over daycare

When my husband and I decided to start a family, daycare was never an issue. Despite our busy lives and demanding careers, we knew our child will be well taken care of because my mother was going to watch her.

One week after returning to work following my maternity leave, my mother was diagnosed with acute leukemia and our lives were thrown upside down.

It took time to accept the new reality; time to readjust our plans and figure out what to do next. Putting our baby in daycare was not an option for us nor was giving up one of our jobs - not because of selfish/ grandiose reasons, but simply because of economics.

So, now what?

Amidst the turmoil of my mother's illness and juggling to meet our jobs' demands, a silver lining called "family and friends" emerged.

I never really understood the saying, "It takes a village to raise a child" until this happened to me. Our families stepped up and offered to watch Aline while we went to work and ran back and forth to hospitals. We did not ask; it was a given. Even distant friends called and offered to babysit.

The generosity extended beyond babysitting. People stopped by and brought dinners because we were too busy to cook; others offered to grocery shop or run errands. Despite our stressful situation and the hurt and pain we were going through, the love of our families and friends made all of it a lot easier to endure.

The "village" grew even bigger when our respective employers allowed us the flexible time we needed to get through this phase of our lives.

During all of it, Aline did not miss a beat; she kept flourishing and growing - a healthy, beautiful, happy baby now 6 months old.

Today, our babysitting arrangement is as follows: Monday, Wednesday and Friday my husband's 20-year-old niece comes to our house and watches her; they play, go for walks, laugh, read books and even cuddle up for naps. On Tuesdays and Thursdays, we take her to my husband's sister-in-law's, where she thrives in the company of four wonderful cousins, a great auntie and a friendly dog named Chalo.

Some people have challenged our arrangement, saying we should find a suitable daycare like everyone else does. I am not against daycare. There are many wonderful facilities out there that would take great care of my baby. Also, I am not one to heed statistics about how babies fare in daycares vs. at home, etc. I never paid attention to these things, nor would I ever want to.

For me, daycare is a great solution that will always exist should I need it. But for now, I have "the village" and it is a wonderful, caring and safe place for my daughter to grow in.